Money doesn’t make up for what your lacking

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This I believe essay
Not everything is how it seems. Most people see a big house and nice cars as the answer to happiness, that if you have those things in return your problems will be solved.
As a child I grew up in a two story suburban house. I grew up with both of my parents who both had nice new cars, a decent relationship, and a lenient way of parenting. To bystanders we seemed like the perfect white upper class suburban family. But underneath the material there were things lacking.

I was fortunate enough to grow up having my mother around daily she was a stay at home mom until I entered middle school. This made it rather easy to build a strong solid relationship with my mother that I still hold on to today. However I wasn’t fortunate enough to see my father every day.

My father grew up in a three bedroom house with his 4 sisters and his mother and father until his father passed when he was 18. My father’s room was in the attic with no heat or air conditioning. When my grandfather passed my grandmother was a wreck so my father didn’t get the opportunity to go to school instead he went to work to support his mother and his sisters. It wasn’t until my father had been working in the ship yard for ten years that he got the opportunity to go to school. By this time he had a family which consisted of my mother, my older brother Mitchell, me, and my younger sister Madison. What that meant was that my dad, the only source of income for our family due to my mother staying at home with us, would have to go to work while earning his degree. This was tough for him, and our family. My father felt like it was important to give my sibling and I what he wasn’t fortunate enough to have when he was younger –stability. So for the first 12 years of my childhood I saw my father two days of the week, Saturday and Sunday, and during those days he was doing homework or trying to rest.

So here I was an upper class white female who lived in a neighborhood built up of houses that were cookie cutter replicas of each other. Every friend from my neighborhood had both their parents just like I did the only difference was that their fathers were around. They were around to teach them how to ride their bike, how to throw a baseball, and spending bonding time with them. And when I was younger I used to get upset because my father wasn’t around to do these things with me. For quite some time I had this overwhelming feeling of jealousy that hung around for quite some time until I started to get older and made friends outside of my neighborhood. I started meeting friends that didn’t have these ‘cookie cutter’ houses and didn’t have the perfect ‘cookie cutter’ families like most of the kids in my neighborhood. This effected me in school because it was difficult for me to find a group of friends that I fit into.

Being a part of a community that expects you to be perfect was hard growing up because my family wasn’t. And sometimes I still wonder what it would have been like had my dad not sacrificed so much of his time to allow us to have this lavish house, cars, and a mother who got to stay home with her children. I wonder if it would have made me any different of a person, or if it would have made my childhood easier. But then I remember that it doesn’t matter because it made me a strong person and it allowed me to focus on school work, playtime, and my relationship with my mother and I’m grateful for that.

So this I believe that no matter your racial background, your religion, or your economic status it is up to you to create something good out of it. It is your responsibility to not covet others and to focus on the good in your own life.

 

FINIAL REFLECTION
After reading my peers posts it really helped calm my anxieties about school. I always feel like I am the only one stuggling, or I am alone in what i’ve been through. It really helped me to see that there are others all around me who have experienced the same struggles I have and others who have stuggled with things I could never imagine having to deal with.
One particular girl’s post I read was about her struggle with depression through school even though she was supposed to be this perfect rich girl. This particular story hit close to home for me because it was like i was reading about my own life. Parents and peers have a great deal to do with the identy of a student. Parents social status directly effects students in many different ways some for the better and some unfortunately for the worse. Peers also affect the identy of a student which was proved in most of the essays I had the opportunity to read. All of these students were dealing with things that they couldn’t change and most of their peers only added to the stress of trying to figure out an identy.
When I become a teacher I will try to afffect my students in good ways! Michael Apple’s youtube video helped me to understand how important it is when your a teacher to try to be effective in not negativly affecting students identy. As a teacher i will try not to use stereotypes to label my students because of what it could do to their identy. I will also be fair in attention and grading and make sure my students are becoming understanding not biased students.
My personal identy as a teacher will effect me because I’ve learned not to judge a book by its cover. So many things happen outside of the classroom that a teacher doesnt see so as a educator I plan to be aware of the fact that I dont know my students full life story and i shouldn’t judge them.

COMMENTS

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Filed under Fall 2013, Females, Kidd, Uncategorized

Parents Don’t Make the Kid (Believe it or Not)

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My Story Narrated

 

My Story

I grew up in poverty with less than concerned parents. One of my biggest sources of pride as a kid was that my dad was in a motorcycle gang. My mom and her boyfriend were pretty much tired of life and of people in general; I rarely saw them. And then there was me. I was shy, friendless, and didn’t fit in anywhere. I mostly felt invisible.

But school was my haven. I usually woke up around four in the morning, and I’d go to school. It would still be dark, and I would just wait. I would lean against this rough brick that would yank at my clothes and pull my hair; my bottom would freeze on the concrete. I loved it.

I really liked my teachers a lot. They were the closest I got to having friends. And some of them seemed to like me back. But others didn’t like me very much. With those ones, it was almost like it made them angry if I did well. The worst of these was my fourth grade teacher. She hated me. I didn’t understood why. I kind of still don’t. She was always yelling at me and separating me from the rest of the class. It felt like I was always somehow wrong.

I was really stoic kid, but she made me cry so often that even my mom noticed. But I thought this teacher was wonderful. I wanted to be one of those kids that she liked. There was a group of them. They were all pretty and perfect, and they had the nicest clothes and best parents. But I couldn’t change any of that about myself.

And that was the start. I thought I might be president. I used to carry around a college catalog with a little notebook where I’d written classes I wanted to take someday.

But teachers are never wrong. Teachers are smart. They know everything. So by the end of fourth grade, I knew from my teacher that there was something wrong with me. I figured out that I must have been born a bad person. And that was all I could grow up to be. So she must have been able to see that in me, and I thought probably everyone else could see that too.

 

The reason I’m telling my story is because people should realize, kids don’t get to pick their parents. If a kid smells like cigarettes and has holes in her clothes, she might still try her absolute best to be a good person and she might care about learning more than almost anything else in the world. So if you see that kid, give her a chance. She might be intelligent. She might be kind. She might be a gentle soul pretty desperately wishing for a friend.

 

I have noticed throughout the readings that identity play an extremely significant role in the way that students view themselves and in determining which actions they take and behaviors they display. Students have so much going on in their heads, even when they are very young. Almost none of those identity-related thoughts are conveyed to teachers. This seems to me to add credibility to the idea that teachers have to have high expectations for all of their students. No matter what the student is thinking, he or she needs to know that the teacher sees a capable learner.

I was really surprised to read about people with whom I share gender and race because they seemed a lot more like me than I expected. When I struggled as a student because I felt like I didn’t fit in, or I wasn’t capable of success, I always felt alone. It seemed like the other students had their heads on straight and their acts together. Even if students got bad grades or sat alone, I kind of thought it was because they wanted to, like they could have done well or they could hang out with lots of friends, but they didn’t care that much or just didn’t choose to. Reading that these females had doubts and problems just like me has helped me to realize that maybe most or all students struggle sometimes and could potentially even be sources of support for one another.

I am not sure if I have ever been stereotyped because of my physical appearance. I think it would be really difficult not to be angry if it happened. It might even be difficult to believe afterwards that not everyone else is thinking the same way, basing their judgments on skin color or manner of speech. This explains at least one reason why some student could be angry in general or hostile to teachers. Even teachers of the same race could be subject to this hostility because they might be thought of as working within a system that seems to propagate prejudices and racism.

A plethora of obstacles are just waiting for opportunities to throw themselves in the way of students’ academic success. Students aren’t cardboard cut-outs or empty vessels waiting to be filled with a teacher’s knowledge. As Kai Davis pointed out, those obstacles can come from any direction, even from teachers, strangers, and peers. I have often thought that professors should treat students like real people with real lives and responsibilities outside of the classroom. I had not given much thought to applying the same idea to all students regardless of age or grade. I believe that is the most valuable _concept that I gained through this self-reflecting task.

 

Kai Davis – Fuck I Look Like (Official Video). 2012. Film.

 

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Filed under Kidd, Spring 2013

5 & 6

comment on loner

I understand what you went through being a loner. Going through family trouble in high school I tried to distance myself from people and that caused problems.

Comment on band:

I hung out with band kids so I know they went on some awesome trips. AS a teacher I will have to work to be sure they don’t fall behind.

David Tuck

4-22-12

TR 1:30-2:45

Identity Exploration

            For this assignment I chose to interview the Jamaican race because I have a lot of friends who are Jamaican. Using this connection it was easy to have them introduce me to someone who I did not know I would be able to interview. This also gave me the opportunity to learn more about my friends’ cultural heritage. I know feel like I have a better understanding why my friends get offended when they get called African American instead of Jamaican.

His experiences as a Jamaican were far different from mine. He had to go through the racism for a group he wasn’t even part of. This gave him a better understanding of another culture as well as his own and he seemed to greatly benefit from this experience. Knowing this I gained a better understanding of both his culture and his life growing up. Especially since he is an United States of America Army brat he also had to deal with moving a lot because of his mother’s deployment. Because of this he also had to start a lot of different schools. Compared to me, Who did not have to worry about changing schools except for the transition from elementary, to middle, and to high school. This made this student feel more like an outsider because he was the new kid so many times. This gave me a better understanding on why he felt like an outsider.

Student’s identities are shaped by their social interactions with both their peers and teachers. These interactions both shape students emotionally and socially. This can be shown by students who are socially inept tends to be less active and engaged in classes. This is because they will develop a fear of being wrong and a desire to be accepted so they will not respond. On the opposite end students who tend to me socially involved tend to be more active in classes. This is because they are more socially accepted, so not only do they already have a clique and friends, and they don’t have to worry about being socially accepted for being. Teachers can aid this because teachers tend to spend most of their time paying attention to either the students who volunteer or the students are being rowdy and disruptive. This causes the students to feel unnoticed and unappreciated resulting in them becoming more withdrawn.

As a future teacher I have to not only see students as more than their skin color but also be sure to actually see them. By that I mean I have to notice and attempt to be sure that I try to get them actively involved in their education.

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Filed under Kidd, Spring 2013

Fear of Thoughts

All throughout high school, I was never sure where I fit in.  I grew up in Northern Virginia moved to Hawaii and then moved back into the house in Virginia that I had originally moved out of.  Everyone I grew up being friends with, seemed to had moved on with their lives and our friendships weren’t really present anymore.  It definitely took a toll on me.  A lot of the time I had questioned to myself, why don’t they like me? What’s wrong with me? Etc.  It was something I never really had an answer to.  Moving somewhere you think you have friends and then have it turn out to be the opposite was an experience I had never been threw.  Sometimes, the question had come across my mind, what would life have been like if I never moved?  Would we still be friends?  Would I still be the same person who I am?  Because of all this, I drew myself inward, and I become more of a quiet person.  Nonetheless, I eventually made friends.  I seemed to gravitate to the exact opposite of who my old friends were, the band kids, theatre kids, and the unpopular crowd.  They were very nice and I become good friends with a couple girls who I still keep in touch with today.  To me, being a member of that group it was almost expected from people, that we wouldn’t do that well in school, that we would be the kids that didn’t care as much and who probably would not go as far in life as other people.  The people who considered to go far in life, were the kids who were considered popular, jocks, smart, and good looking, my old friends.  Being in the situation I was in, both of these groups were the ones who had really contributed to my identity and why I felt like I didn’t completely fit in with either of the 2 crowds.  Some activities I wanted to participate in or go out and either do/try, my new friends had no interest in and never wanted to go with me.  Where as some other activities my old groups of friends participated in, I had no interest in either.   At the end of the day, all I wanted to do was go home, and have my old life back.  I wasn’t sure of who I was, where I wanted to go, what I wanted to do.  Etc.  During high school my mind was so stuck on the past that looking back, I had missed out on activities and opportunities I could have taken up simply because of fear.  I was scared people wouldn’t like me, judge me wrong, and not see who I was.  Now that I’m in college, I really wish I had not been so scared in high school and not so focused on what other people had thought of me.  It still affects me today occasionally.  Some days I overthink things and feel like I’m being awkward.  But I just have to remind myself, that a lot of people don’t know me, and as clique as it sounds, but if I just be myself, I’ll find people who really do like me, and vice versa.  It’s impossible to completely omit other people’s thoughts about you, but it doesn’t have to be a focal point in your life, overtherwise it really holds you back on who you are, and what you really can accomplish.

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Filed under Kidd, Spring 2013

Quiet Girl. Shy Girl. Walk behind the Leader……ready…. set.…RUN!!!

Sadly, I did not get to post this assignment on the due date.  I decided to write a blog post so that I could read the other entries and write a final reflection in response to what I found through other people’s experiences.

When I was in middle school and early highschool, I was a rather shy individual.  I had spent all of my elementary years (including my 6th grade year) in a private Christian school where my childhood was wrapped around the bliss of “butterflies and rainbows”.  Nothing “bad” ever happened in our school.  If a child said “shut up” it was practically a criminal offense….Yep… it was thaaaat sheltered! I have very limited memories of “negative” situations from my childhood experiences in my elementary school.  I had no exposure to the harshness of the “real world”.  (Which in some ways was good… but in other ways it was bad.)

When I entered public school in the 7th grade, I was the “new girl” who was suffering from a severe case of culture shock.  Kids were now cursing, smoking, exploring sex, etc.   It was a HUGE and SCARY change to cope with.  Thankfully, I found a really good group of girls to hang out with.  I chose to mimic their behavior and I pretended to find interest in everything that they were involved with.  I was a complete follower.  I absolutely found comfort in the shelter of their world.  I “followed” these girls all the way into high school.  I didn’t try to break away from their influence until around my tenth grade year.  I started to realized that I had a taste for athletics.  None of the girls in my group were athletes, and sports did not fit into their “dainty, girlie, clean, polished”… bla bla bla … lifestyle.  They would rather sit on the sidelines and giggle about the social drama that was swirling around the school.

When I told them that I was trying out for the most aggressive female sport in our school, my friends rolled their eyes and told me not to get my hopes up.  I wanted to try out for the field hockey team.  It was a royal dynasty in our high school… an undefeated society of superior female athletes.   Bloodshed and tears were required to complete the grueling week of tryouts…whether you made the team or not…it was Hell. — but that’s what I wanted.  I wanted to prove to myself and my “girlie” peers that I was more than the ball of wax that I had allowed them to mold me into.  I was eager to explore myself… I wanted to step out of their shadow.

Loooong story, but I actually defied the odds and made the field hockey team.  I wasn’t an extraordinary player, but I discovered that I had stamina…. I had endurance… I had an endless amount of speed..… I could RUN!  I was one of the fastest girls on the team, and I was later recruited to join the girl’s cross country team.  Surprisingly, I was THE fastest girl on my highschool’s cross country team.  Who would have known?  I realized that I could run for miles and miles and use every minute of my jogs to reflect and release any form of stress in my life.  I had always been complacent… I had always enjoyed living in the shadow of the other girls in my group.  I never dared to step outside of their “clique” because it was comfortable and easy to stay within.  Once I chose to step outside of that group, the doors opened wider and wider in my life.  It felt wonderful to step into my own decisions… and I literally ran away with the new freedom!

 

Final Reflection:

I really enjoyed this assignment, even though I participated at the end of the journey.  I found that many of my classmates shared similar experiences.  Many of us felt trapped within stereotypes or expectations.  Hardly any of us knew who we were as individuals until later in our lives.  We were “comfortable” within the “group” that we found ourselves existing among.

I had the pleasure of reading a story about a classmate who was born in an upper class household.  She became psychologically tortured within herself and became a victim of depression because so many other students falsely categorized her as the “perfect little rich girl who gets everything handed to her.”  None of her peers bothered to realize that she had depth beyond her parent’s socio-economic status.  Her classmates defined her by her household…. not by her individual personality or footprint in this world.  Her experience made me realize that assumptions and stereotypes can be severely damaging.  Sadly, this student became negatively influenced by the world around her.  It took a lot of effort accompanied by the support of close friends and family to pull her out of the depression that she was trapped beneath.   It scares me when I wonder how many other students deal with the same social issue… from students.. from teachers… from society…….. Hopefully they all rise above the stereotypes as my classmate successfully did.

As a future teacher, I pray that I am able to visualize my students through a lens that is blind to assumptions and hasty judgments.  I hope to identify my students for who they are and not where/what they come from.

Michael Apple, Ed.D expressed that “Schools produce identities.  They are the sites of identity work.” It is my goal to encourage my students, as well as my peers,  to avoid the temptation to categorize or “group” each other among false stereotypes.  We should learn to embrace and enjoy our individual differences.  I hope that I can help my students to discover WHO they are as unique and wonderful INDIVIDUALS.  We should not be defined by the who/what/where descriptions that surround us.

Cited Source:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=anu2juqz4ts

Comments:

1.) Lady laxer:

http://tled301.courses.digitalodu.com/?p=673#comment-397

2.)  Hello Elizabeth!  Nice to finally meet you.

http://tled301.courses.digitalodu.com/?p=272#comment-399

3) You are Asian.  Ok white boy.

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4) Am I there yet?

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Filed under Kidd, Spring 2013

No ones good all the time…

I have always been around church and attended Sunday services with my family since a very young age. However, it was not until my eighth grade year at DBCS that I really started to understand God’s message and plan for my life. Throughout my time at DBCS I developed many wonderful relationships with my peers. It wasn’t until I decided to try out for the competition cheerleading team and made it, that I really began to find my place in the student body. Cheerleading became my passion, I finally had found something I loved to do and that I was good at. Being a gymnast from a very young age gave me something to bring to the team. I built close relationships with the girls on my team as well as the coaches.

Just when I thought I had found peace of mind and a place where I truly felt I belonged my parents bought a house in Poquoson at the end of my sophomore year. Living in Poquoson gave us access to a good school system that had an overall good reputation and did not come with any tuition fees. This of course, was a more reasonable financial choice for my family. I had heard certain things about Poquoson High School and how there were many predetermined cliques. Being in a Christian school for so long I had no idea what to expect attending a public high school. Luckily, cheerleading tryouts took place in the summer before school started giving me the opportunity to meet some people ahead of time by making the team as a flyer.

Poquoson is a small town so naturally word got around fast that there was a new girl in school. Word also got around that I came from a Christian school and I was given the title, “goody-goody” or as some people called me, “straight-edge”. Throughout the year I found myself hanging out with the “popular” group in school. A lot of the people in this group were known to drink, smoke, and party. Although, I did not participate in the drinking or smoking I did attend several parties and of course was the dd (designated driver) every time. I was pressured many times to participate in these activities but always turned them down.  As a started to build new relationships with this group of students I began to become once again an advisor to my friends. People confided in me and knew that I would give them my honest opinion; I guess at the time people saw me as this “good girl” and valued my opinion.

Although this “good girl” image I had gained seemed to be like a good thing it also came with a lot of pressure. One weekend during my senior year, I went to a friend’s house for a party where a lot of my friends were also. My mom had dropped my two friends and I off and planned to pick us up later that night. Everyone was playing a drinking game called quarters where someone spins a quarter takes a sip of their beer with one hand and then must grab the quarter with that same hand before it stops spinning. I watched as all my friends took turns drinking and catching the quarter; it looked like a lot of fun. One of my guy friends then asked me if I would like to play maybe just one round, since he knew I had never drank before. I thought about it for a second and came to the conclusion that I knew I wasn’t driving and that my mom was picking me up later so it wouldn’t be the end of the world if I had maybe one beer. As soon as I agreed to join the game I could see everyone’s faces drop. I didn’t really think anything of it at the time since everyone else was drinking too and it was only one beer.

The following week at school word had spread like wild fire that I drank at the party. People who weren’t even at the party were saying that I got super drunk and made a complete fool out of myself in front of everyone; which was not the case at all. I could tell that everyone was acting different towards me and giving me looks of disapproval. I remember feeling extremely disappointed in myself and my actions I had taken. I began to see myself as a failure to my friends, family, and everyone who looked up to me for being different. The pressure to maintain this “good girl” reputation was overwhelming and at times a hindrance to certain things I wanted to experience. As time went on I entered my first year of college where no one knew who I was and I didn’t have to live up to anyone else’s standards.

Although, I never put myself in any crazy situations concerning the party life I did begin to figure out who I really was and was able to finally relax and be myself. Today, I still have a “good girl” reputation but I no longer see it as some high standard I must hold myself to. Yes, I have morals and am still a Christian; that will always have an effect on the decisions I make. However, I know now that it is ok to make mistakes as long as you learn and grow from them.

jdij

 

How “easy” can you be

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A broken cheerleader

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beauty, brains, and black

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I am beautiful

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Filed under Kidd, Spring 2013

Final Reflection

This assignment was very interesting. I really enjoyed reading about other people’s stories and seeing how they were similar or different from my own. I had titled my post “Miss Insecure,” and talked about my insecurities and being overweight. I was also surprised how supportive and positive the students who commented on my blog were. That meant a lot to read all of the nice things they had to say.

At first I thought the experiences of the students in my group would be pretty much identical to my own. While most of these students said they were overweight all through their childhood, adolescence, and into adulthood, my experience was a little different in that except my chubby phase in eighth grade I didn’t put on all of my weight until after high school. Despite this difference, I was able to relate to being self-conscious in high school because I still suffered from body image issues and sometimes I just didn’t good enough compared to my peers. Another difference was that a lot of these students were athletes in high school. I did not play a sport in high school. I had support from my family and while this seemed to be the case with most, it was not the case for everyone. Overall though, I could relate to their struggles, because they were similar to my own.

Before reading the blogs of students who categorized themselves differently, I made the assumption that our stories wouldn’t be similar at all. I was wrong. In the 2 other blogs I read, I could find a common thread that I could relate to in some way. One of the blogs I read was about a guy whose parents always pushed him to become a doctor, as he wrote was common in the Asian culture. He had no interest in becoming a doctor and finally stood up to his parents. He told them he aspired to become a teacher. His parents laughed at his dream and said he would be poor. While my parents have never pushed me to be something I don’t want to be, people constantly make comments to me about how I will be poor and unhappy if I become a teacher, and tell me that I should choose to do something different with my life. The difference between his story and mine was that he is from a different race and culture, and that his parents were so strict and demanding about what his career should be. In the second blog, the student talked about how he was 1/4 Japanese and 3/4 Caucasian. He said that when he did something well like math or karate, his white friends would say “oh that’s just because you’re white.” His Asian friends always said he wasn’t Asian enough. While I didn’t share his experience of struggling to define myself in regards to race, I could relate to other people making judgments about who you are. To some people I think I am simply a fat girl, and they don’t see anything beyond that. This can be very frustrating. Eventually he embraced both parts of his heritage and I think that is great.

Your experience in high school can play a part in shaping who you are for the rest of your life. Some people overcome their struggles, while others can’t. As instructors it’s imperative that we remember that everyone’s story is different, and sometimes students are going through things at home or possibly in school, that we can’t even imagine. We must not play into the stereotypes that run rampant in our society. You can’t make assumptions about students based on their ethnicity, their weight, or anything else. High school can be very difficult socially for many students, and it is important that as teachers we are supportive and always there to lend an ear. It is also important to remember that we have all been in that place where we were trying to find our identity. I think that’s why I could relate in some way to every story I read. We were all confused teenagers trying to find our way, and trying to figure out who we were meant to be in this world.

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how “easy” can you be?

Growing up, cheerleading was my passion. I started cheering in first grade and had to end my senior year of highschool. I met some of best friends today from cheering together. When I was younger and would see movies with cheerleaders playing the head roles, I couldn’t wait to get to highschool. I thought life would be so glamorous and everything would be perfect. BOY WAS I WRONG! My first two years of high school I didn’t cheer for my school. I was still on my all star competitive team. My last two years of high school I was on the varsity team and my life was different. I got called all the names you could think of. I was told by my peers I wouldn’t get good grades, I’d be called a slut, the whole nine yards. Teachers would pick on me and make fun of me because I was the stereotypical “dumb blonde cheerleader”. Funny thing was though, I was a brunette and had all A’s and B’s throughout highschool. I made the honor roll every year and scored pretty high SAT’s. The worst part of me being a cheerleader in highschool was the nasty rumors that came along with it. I remained a virgin all throughout highschool but somehow graduated with people thinking I slept with eight people and would hookup with half the football players in the locker rooms before/after big football games. The rumors people came up with about my teammates and I were absolutely ridiculous. I didn’t let them get to me though, well I tried not to. I knew who I was when I got home everyday and I knew these things weren’t true about me. But some people believed them and obviously thought less of me as they saw me in the hallways. It’s not a good feeling when you walk from class to class and can see/hear people whispering about you and these rumors.

 

FINAL REFLECTION

The experiences that I shared with people who were a member of the same group as I was were very similar. I grouped myself a cheerleader in high school and the two stories I read and commented on were almost identical to mine. One story I read, the author and I both suffered an injury and had to stop doing what we loved. Her story was different from mine because she got very depressed and injured herself over and over in the same way. All in all we both got very hurt and had to end our cheering careers. The next story I read about a girl who grouped herself as a cheerleader as well, we shared similarities by being classified as typical cheerleader stereotypes. We both dealt with teachers singling us out just because the extra curricular we chose and got judged by people in different groups because they thought we were these awful people on the inside. Her story was different than mine because she had a teacher tell her parents that cheerleading was stupid and they shouldn’t let her continue because it was interfering with her grades, which it really wasn’t. Student identities are shaped so easily by interactions with peers, teachers and schools. Being around the same people for six or more hours a day, five days a week really influences you. If a school didn’t have tardy bells or a policy about being on time, students will start to think having to be on time anywhere wasn’t important. Some students could become very lazy and just “lolly-gag” everywhere. If a teacher has a classroom set up to believe that all football players are just big jocks who don’t care about anything but winning a championship game, people will start to believe that because that is what they’re exposed to day in and day out. As for peers, that’s the biggest influence. Hanging around a certain group of students can really alter a person’s way of viewing themselves, or people not in that group. The cheerleader example is such a great example. People who do not cheer tend to view cheerleaders as airheads, “easy” girls, popular, ditzy; the list can go on and on. Even if someone in, say a gothic group, have never met a cheerleader; that is what they typically think. In high school, I was friends with everyone, even though I was a captain of the varsity cheer squad. I’ve had my own friends tell me that I hung out with “the weird kids” in high school, just because they were into art and we weren’t. Interacting with your peers can shape a student’s identity for the worse, or the better. I think the significance of knowing how easily people in the school form identities are so important as a teacher. Being a teacher, you have the power to do so much in a classroom. We’ve talked so many times in class about how we teach values in the classroom and I think that is a way to help students “identify” themselves. From section one, Kai Davis’s story was my favorite. I loved her poem. Her poem was all about black stereotypes and how she was above them. How she was nothing like the “typical black person”. I think as a teacher it is beyond important to understand the stereotypes for all the different students in their class. Certain stereotypes can discourage students from not wanting to do their best in class, not wanting to really be themselves. As a teacher, if you don’t try and understand WHY these students are acting out or not doing their best, we can only make it worse on them. We have to be there for them as a friend and make sure they feel safe in the class, that no one is ever judging them and it’s a place to be yourself every second of the school day.

REPLIES

overweight & now overjoyed

http://tled301.courses.digitalodu.com/?p=625#comment-236

 

so unusual

http://tled301.courses.digitalodu.com/?p=692#comment-237

 

a broken cheerleader

http://tled301.courses.digitalodu.com/?p=765#comment-238

 

dumb cheerleader, I think not

http://tled301.courses.digitalodu.com/?p=567#comment-239

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Final Reflection

As I was reading I realized just how different everyone’s backgrounds are.  Part of me thinks that, I grew up almost in a little protective bubble.  I truly believed that everyone was different and that was what made them special.  That you could do anything, if you just put your mind to it.  I knew that kids could be mean and that not everything was always fair, but that at the end of the day everything always seemed to work itself out.  I feel very lucky to grow up in a small town, where everyone knew your name.  I had so many different types of friends and we complimented each other well.

Diversity was never an issue because we were all about the same.  Even though I now live in a very diverse area, to me it is still a non-issue.  I am also trying to raise my children to look past the outside and learn about the person.  To this day if one of my kids is describing a new friend to me, the color of their skin or their ethnic back ground is never brought up.  I love that my kids are like this.

There are so many great post that tough me so much.  Especially the students labeled smart or gifted.  I always thought that it came easy to these students.  I truly didn’t think that maybe they were stressed about maybe not being good enough, or letting their parents down if their grades were not high enough.  Sometimes I look back at high school and wish that someone had pushed me harder.  Until my senior year I did not apply myself at all.  I was just an average b or c student that was just getting by.  My senior year I decided to actually do the work, and not only did I get straight A’s but I received the award for the most improved student.  Of all my teachers only had one that said, now those are the grades I knew you could have.

There was one post that really stood out to me.  The “Pregnant” post.  When most kids were still worrying about what to wear or who they wanted to go out with, she was making decisions that would not only affect her, but also the baby she was carrying.   These are decisions that kids are not ready to make.  She should be proud of putting that baby first.  I would love to hear more of her story.  But it really hits home because my mother was also put up for adoption when she was a baby.  It takes a strong person to love you enough to want more for you.

Overall I don’t feel like I fit into any one category listed, which was not too different than how I was in high school.  I have met so many amazing people and to hear their stories and how you can learn by watching and listening.  I think I will easily be able to apply this to my teaching and to my students.  I know that I will learn from them also.

 

REPLIES

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loner

I am what you call a military brat. My dad is now entering his 29th year in the navy. We get good benefits being a military family, but it has not always been easy. When I was in the fifth grade my family found out we were moving to San Diego. I was not happy about this move at first because I did not want to leave my friends and family here in Virginia. But I was young and tried to think of the move as an adventure to shadow the pain.
All of my mom’s family lived in San Diego so I had been there times before but moving there gave me a totally new view, I fell in love with everything. We arrived in San Diego in the summer of my fifth grade year so we began registering for school immediately. When school started I made friends almost immediately. When I lived in Virginia the majority of my friends were either white or black, but San Diego has such a diverse population. I had friends that were black, white, Asian, Mexican, and even Muslim. I absolutely loved my life there, everything seemed perfect. But in May of 2009 everything changed. My dad got orders to move back to Virginia. I was absolutely devastated. I loved my life and I didn’t want anything to change. Even worse we had to move by September. June came and left, July came and left, and August came and left.
I prayed everyday that this would somehow turn around and we would be able to stay.
It was now September, the month I had been dreading. My friend had her quince the day before my family was scheduled to leave, so that was like a going away party for me and that was he last day I saw some of my best friends.
We got to Virginia about a week later (we drove) and had to get registered for school, the school year had already started and my mom did not want us to be anymore behind. Before I stared school I told myself that I was not going to make friends, I didn’t want to get close to anyone. It felt like everyone I got close to, I lost. As the year progressed that is exactly what I did, I did not make a single friend my tenth grade year of high school. By my eleventh grade year I had adapted to being in Virginia. I still missed my friends greatly but I was not sad all the time. I still had no friends though. I soon realized that intentionally not making friends was a dumb thing to do. But now, being a junior, it was hard to make friends. Everyone had known each other from middle school or had became friends their freshmen year. And me being shy didn’t really help either. I had come from not wanting friends to not being able to make friends. I considered myself a loner. I would be tardy to class just so I didn’t have to wait for class to start alone. I wouldn’t eat lunch because I didn’t want to eat by myself, I would go in the library, and the days that the library was closed during lunch I would sit in the bathroom stalls until lunch was over. My life was miserable. I hated school and I hated myself. I knew people talked about me which mad me very insecure. I wish this had a happy ending but it really doesn’t. My senior year got a little better, I had acquaintances that I would talk to in class or say hi to in the halls but I did not make one friend at my high school, not one. This has really made me the person that I am today. I am very humble and I try not to make anyone feel left out because I know what it feels like to be alone.

FINAL REFLECTION

This assignment was a real eye opener for me. I not only learned a lot about myself nut I learned a lot about others as well. This assignment helped me realize that I wasn’t the only one having the thoughts that I was having. There were people going through the same thing that I went through. This project also helped me to become less biased. I seen that people are different, people have different styles and feelings and it is not my job to judge others. I realized that I would sometimes unintentionally judge others.  One of the stories I read was about a girl that loved herself as she was. She was black beautiful and smart. I am very insecure about a lot of things so this is one story that I could not relate to. I told her that I wished I could have her confidence and that her story inspired me to love myself. Another story I read was about a girl who was being who everyone else expected her to be instead of who she wanted to be. I can relate to this story because growing up I always liked to be noticed so sometimes I would do things just for the attention. As I got older I realized that it was too much work trying to please others and I was better off just being myself and having friends that liked me for me. I feel like kids, like me try to fit in and please others and sometimes they get that mistaken as their identity. For example, if a kid is at the store with his friends and they dare him to steal something, instead of doing what he knows is right, he steals it because he wants to fit in. he gets caught and he is now considered a thief, that is not who he is. It is important to know this as a teacher because sometimes we are so quick to judge and we need to take the time to get to know our students and know their personalities so we can be able to tell if something is wrong with them. “At several stages of development, the teacher has the opportunity to help students navigate their self understandings by being supportive and responsive in a number of ways (How Racial Identity Affects Performance 3).

REPLIES

my links would not activate, i watched the video.

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Filed under Kidd, Spring 2013